10 Things Every Stay At Home Mom Needs To Hear
1. You Are Smart.
Many parents gave up jobs and careers, even some that they went to school for years for, to become a stay at home parent. Some days we do not feel like we are living up to our fullest potential intellectually. Do not get me wrong, the choice to stay home with our children was made out of love for them and wanting what is best for them, but one's brain is typically not challenged to its full capacity singing Mary Had A Little Lamb and watching Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.
2. You Are Beautiful.
Because we never feel beautiful at 5:00 with our top knot hanging off to the side of our head, mascara smeared under our eyes (if we were lucky enough to get makeup on to begin with), and our mom leggings on (or pajamas if we're being honest).
3. It Looks Like You Got A Lot Accomplished Today.
Even if it doesn't look that way, we need to hear that. We are our own worst critics. We have a to do list about 200 items long every single day. It is impossible to get everything done that we want to, yet we expect to. Its nice to hear when some of our accomplishments are noticed and valued.
4. The Kids Look Like They Had A Good Day.
As moms we guilt ourselves often on not being able to keep up with housework, side jobs, and personal tasks all while spending quality one on one time with our children all day long. Some days we spend loads of time with the kids and ignore the other work while some days that other stuff is so piled up that we need to tend to it and the kids take a little bit of a back seat (although who are we kidding, they demand front seat type attention). Mom guilt is rough, it is nice to be reminded that our kids look happy and satisfied even if we didn't do Pinterest worthy activities with them or maybe lost our patience with them a little too much. Disclaimer: Only say this if they are not screaming and crying when you walk in the door.
5. Thank You.
Obviously, this one is self explanatory, but important nonetheless. A simple thank you can change a frustrated, on the verge of meltdown mom back to the mom and wife you know and love.
6. This Dinner Is Delicious.
Even.If.It's.Not. Cooking dinner at 5:00 with hangry induced toddler meltdowns and screaming babies going though the witching hours is no easy feat. The fact that it gets served at all is some days a miracle.
7. What Do You Need Me To Do?
Bless my husband who is so good at asking this question. When you phrase it like this as opposed to "Do you need me to do anything?" it gives us the opportunity to ask for help and not feel bad about it. By asking this you are expecting an answer in the form of what to do, not a yes or no.
8. Do You Want To Talk About Your Day?
Because sometimes we don't. Sometimes all we want is silence and a chance to hear our own thoughts in our heads. There are days where if you ask "How was your day?" we want to respond with "How would your day be if you were ringmaster to the circus monkeys?". But then there are other days when we crave adult conversation and we would love nothing more than to block out the child banter and talk with you.
9. I Love You.
Again, an obvious one but such an important thing to say. Everything we do, we do out of love. There is no other reason on Earth that we wipe butts, wake up to a human alarm clock at all hours of the night, cook whatever is demanded of us, and tolerate harsh words and actions that are sometimes thrown our way by a certain someone or someones that may or may not need a nap immediately. It's nice to hear that we are loved right back unconditionally.
10. Do you want a glass of wine?
A little bit comical, but in all honesty, usually that glass of wine or special drink also involves some one on one time with you and maybe it even means that you have arranged a sitter and are taking us out for a date! Either way, it is a nice reprieve from the demands of motherhood, one that we welcome with open arms.
Anyone else have something to add to the list? Comment below! And please know that for all you stay at home dads this certainly applies to you as well (except maybe the part about the topknot, mascara, and leggings LOL)! And don't worry, I am well aware that every story has two sides and there will be a follow up post on what us stay at home moms can say to help out the hard working dads!